Dearest readers, you may have noticed that I've used to the last few articles to discuss tech-related privacy issues. I find this entire topic very interesting because, as a society, we seem to be quick to accept the increasing pace at which our privacy is losing ground. Do you remember that, when Android phones were just starting out, there were many articles outlining how objectionable and abominable the ideas is that our phones would have GPS built in and companies could track out movement at all times? Today, it's considered either harmless or- at worst- a necessary evil. However, this is only on the surface and in general terms. When you look at it more carefully on a use case basis, you can easily get chills running down your spine. Having said that, I would like to talk about one such use case- location sharing feature in messaging apps that works in a single or a few taps, and what it does to dating and relationships.
Sharing your location with people you know within apps like Google Allo is a very useful feature. Let's say you're meeting someone like a new romantic interest or a friend somewhere downtown, and they're having trouble finding you. You share your location, they see it on the map, and then they should be able to find you more easily. Sounds good, doesn't it?
In practice, however, it's terrible. I tried it with friends just for fun, and any time we did it the location was very inaccurate- same results regardless of what phone hardware you have. This makes it useless for drivers and pedestrians alike- especially when arranging hangouts. In fact, sending the exact address of where to meet and then having the other person use Google Maps directions is much more effective because it is more accurate. You put in the address, you hit navigation for driving or walking, and away you go to your meetup spot!
So, if using Google Maps directions is so much better, why introduce location sharing in the first place? Is it meant to have one person force another to share their location instead of simply saying where they are and using mutual trust and respect in the process? Personally, I think this is bad for dating and relationships in general- even more so for couples who don't live together yet. Having mutual trust and respect is an important part of establishing a long-term, loving relationship. It is a human way to bond, and has been a part of our evolution for hundreds of thousands of years. If we suddenly eliminate the need for mutual trust and respect because hey, we can rely on technology so there's no need for trust, we can never truly bond and our relationships are doomed to fail. Besides, if you tell your s/o you are at a certain place when they ask you, and then they're not happy and still want to see your location, what's to stop you from flipping them off over the phone and finding a new s/o who won't do that to you and will prefer to learn to trust each other? Oh, and let's not forget little white lies as they're called- lying about where you are because you forgot to do an errand, you're preparing a surprise party, you're dealing with a private problem etc. Clearly, there are many reasons not to use this feature altogether.
While the location sharing feature is definitely bad, it is only one on a long list of tech-related issues that eliminate the need for mutual trust and respect and prevent long-term bonding. Instead of discussing them in individual articles, I'd like to list a few more here so you can consider them as well:
Remember, dearest readers, here in the West we are getting into long-term relationships at a later age in life. Being single longer means that we become more accustomed to our own individuality, our own freedoms, and our habits and digital history (social media, email etc) become more diverse over time, and all of us have a skeleton or two in our closets; you cannot become a successful adult without making a few mistakes along the way. By laying all of that out at your s/o's feet and sharing your location whenever they feel like it instead of focusing on mutual trust, respect and planning out the present and future together - you are pushing your relationship sideways past the point of no return.
Make it simple- don't do it.
Sharing your location with people you know within apps like Google Allo is a very useful feature. Let's say you're meeting someone like a new romantic interest or a friend somewhere downtown, and they're having trouble finding you. You share your location, they see it on the map, and then they should be able to find you more easily. Sounds good, doesn't it?
In practice, however, it's terrible. I tried it with friends just for fun, and any time we did it the location was very inaccurate- same results regardless of what phone hardware you have. This makes it useless for drivers and pedestrians alike- especially when arranging hangouts. In fact, sending the exact address of where to meet and then having the other person use Google Maps directions is much more effective because it is more accurate. You put in the address, you hit navigation for driving or walking, and away you go to your meetup spot!
So, if using Google Maps directions is so much better, why introduce location sharing in the first place? Is it meant to have one person force another to share their location instead of simply saying where they are and using mutual trust and respect in the process? Personally, I think this is bad for dating and relationships in general- even more so for couples who don't live together yet. Having mutual trust and respect is an important part of establishing a long-term, loving relationship. It is a human way to bond, and has been a part of our evolution for hundreds of thousands of years. If we suddenly eliminate the need for mutual trust and respect because hey, we can rely on technology so there's no need for trust, we can never truly bond and our relationships are doomed to fail. Besides, if you tell your s/o you are at a certain place when they ask you, and then they're not happy and still want to see your location, what's to stop you from flipping them off over the phone and finding a new s/o who won't do that to you and will prefer to learn to trust each other? Oh, and let's not forget little white lies as they're called- lying about where you are because you forgot to do an errand, you're preparing a surprise party, you're dealing with a private problem etc. Clearly, there are many reasons not to use this feature altogether.
While the location sharing feature is definitely bad, it is only one on a long list of tech-related issues that eliminate the need for mutual trust and respect and prevent long-term bonding. Instead of discussing them in individual articles, I'd like to list a few more here so you can consider them as well:
- Sharing personal email passwords.
- Sharing social media passwords (Facebook, Instagram etc.).
- If both of you have Pornhub, sharing Pornhub passwords haha (you may not want to see your s/o's playlists and what turns them on when they get tired of "conventional" porn- it has little to do with real, everyday life).
Remember, dearest readers, here in the West we are getting into long-term relationships at a later age in life. Being single longer means that we become more accustomed to our own individuality, our own freedoms, and our habits and digital history (social media, email etc) become more diverse over time, and all of us have a skeleton or two in our closets; you cannot become a successful adult without making a few mistakes along the way. By laying all of that out at your s/o's feet and sharing your location whenever they feel like it instead of focusing on mutual trust, respect and planning out the present and future together - you are pushing your relationship sideways past the point of no return.
Make it simple- don't do it.